After talking to people over the years, I’ve heard people say they feel like they’ll never be happy. That begs the question, “What is your definition of happy?” Most people don’t know how to answer this question. Over the years, part of my job was to develop person centered plans. In these plans you discuss people’s short term and long term goals. Most of the time people say, “I want to be happy.”
If you’re always searching for “happy” how will you know when you get there if you don’t know you’re definition?
I believe it’s very beneficial to find happiness daily. Have you ever gone to buy a car? You look around and find something you like. You think it’s great and there aren’t very many of them around in your city. When you get it and start driving it, you see them every where you look. Happiness can be like this as well. Your subconscious looks for what we train it to look for. Another way to say this is that you see what you want to see.
So if you see what you want to see, then decide what you want to see. Didn’t see that coming did you? J I suggest writing down little things that make you happy. Thinking on paper is a great habit to get into. So, what makes you happy? A baby smiling? A funny movie? A certain movie genre? Music? Playing an instrument? A sunset? A sunrise? That new car smell? Thai food? Spending time with friends and/or family? Your children? When your children leave for a while? If you’re always looking for things to make you smile instead of things to tick you off, you’ll notice a difference. Don’t get me wrong there are always things that will come up that make you unhappy as well…but overall do your best to look for the good.
Next I would recommend thinking about what you’d like your life to look like when you are “happy.” When you reach this ideal, what does it look like? Do you live on your own private island with a few million dollars in the bank? Do you live in the country? How much money do you make? One exercise I’ve done is written down your ideal day. What will you do on your ideal day? What time will you get up? Will you be alone? If not, who will you be with? Then you just roll through your day.
This sounds like an odd thing to do, but it really helps you get a clear picture in your mind. If you have a picture of what you’re aiming towards, your subconscious can be working towards it. Of course, you have to take action to get to that spot. It’s your subconscious, not a magic wand. Take action! Do something daily to move you towards your definition of happiness!
So I made it through this whole post without quoting that Bobby McFerrin song. Bonus points for me.